This is the third tip in my series of Top 5 Alternative Workstyle Tips.  It is the follow-on to Alternative Workstyle Tip 2 – Work Within Your Own Unique Work Rhythm.

Learn to say “No”

By now you should have a clear picture of what you can and cannot do in any given day.  If you’re like most people, you probably don’t have enough time in the day to complete all that you would like and still have that elusive “work/life balance”.  You have one choice.  Say “no”.   It’s not easy, and you will probably have to say “no” more than you would like, but learning to say “no” will ultimately help you achieve more than you could realize in your alternative workstyle.

A friend at Fifth Street Financial Group must have sensed I needed help in this area.  He introduced me to Corporate Consultant Ned Kraft who has an amazing downloadable audio program “Say No and Feel Great”.  For someone who grew up thinking that a “yes” showed commitment, willingness, motivation, drive, and success, learning to say “no” was not an answer I was comfortable with.  Saying “no” was for naysayers, downers, and people who were just unwilling to extend themselves for the benefit of others.

Pretty warped to have put all that emotional baggage and concern on what others thought of me by saying “no”- by doing so, I allowed others to determine the value of my time, my energy, and my priorities, rather than allowing myself to do so.  But I did. And I suffered for it.  I found myself committing to things that I didn’t really enjoy doing, or took my away from doing the things that brought me joy and gave me energy.  I found myself feeling grumpy, a lot.

After just one listen of Ned’s audio, the idea of saying “no” feels comfortable, strategic and thoughtful.  Ned reminds us that time lost doing things we don’t really want to do can never be retrieved, and by saying yes to these things, we are choosing to give that time away, we are choosing to waste that time.  Saying “no” becomes a tool to help focus our lives and our work, not a statement of negativity.

If you need help saying “no”, listen to this audio and free yourself!  I have noticed a significant change in my ability to manage my relationships, both professional and personal since listening to Ned’s audio.  I am better at surrounding myself with relationships that give me energy, that I enjoy, and that I look forward to, rather than relationships that I maintain out of a feeling of obligation.   I’m more conscious of saying “no” to commitments that arise from those obligatory relationships, and it really has felt great.

Come back tomorrow for Tip – 4, Develop a Professional Network or click the “Follow” button on the right to get these tips delivered to your email!

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• How I use Flipside Workspace to Manage My Alternative Workstyle (alternativeworkstyle.com)
• Working in an Alternative Workstyle (alternativeworkstyle.com)
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